How to Be More Loving: Loving Kindness (Metta), The First Brahma-Vihara

The Brahma-Viharas, translated by some as “sublime attitudes,” are the Buddha’s most important teachings of the heart. There are 4 of them: metta (loving-kindness), karuna (compassion), mudita (appreciative joy), upekkha (equanimity). Over the next four posts, I will discuss each of the Brahma-Viharas in depth from a personal point of view. Let’s begin with loving-kindness.

Why Loving-Kindness?

If you’re like me, anger, envy, and competition are frequent guests in my psyche. As an individual, it is very easy to see the world through the lens of “I.” After all, how else would we see the world? Why question our consciousness? In one respect, you don’t have to question it at all. Most people do not. It’s not anyone’s fault, just like a fish not knowing what water is:

“There are these two young fish swimming along and they happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says “Morning, boys. How’s the water?” And the two young fish swim on for a bit, and then eventually one of them looks over at the other and goes “What the hell is water?”

Most of us don’t question our fundamental reality because it has always been. As a result, it is very natural to become very self-centered and think “I” am the center of my…